Dog Breath Afternoon

A surefire way to get one's mind off of any deprivation diet is to take one's cat to the veterinarian.  The sheer horror of this experience will cause one to expend thousands of calories through blood, sweat, and tears, as well as erode any appetite one might have had.  The shrieking alone is enough to shut down one's digestive system.  By shrieking - I mean bowels of the earth, rotating of the head, pea soup spewing howls.  The kind only special effects can produce.  This, in addition, to the frenzied licking of unmentionables in the presence of strangers is enough to quell anyone's appetite.  Cats are not meant to be transported anywhere but to Hell in a hand basket.  And dogs - well - suck on a mint, will ya???